The 30-Day No Contact Diary: Relapses, Wins, and What I’d Do Again

I went 30 days no contact after my breakup. Here’s my diary—relapses, small wins, and the one lesson I’d repeat if I had to do it all again.

Here is an account of what really happens when you commit to No Contact for 30 days? It’s not just silence—it’s relapses, messy nights, small wins, and eventually, a quiet kind of power. Here’s my diary and real voices from the Let It Go community.

The day I decided to go No Contact, I thought it would feel powerful, like reclaiming my dignity with a single swipe. Instead it felt like standing at the edge of a cliff with my phone in my hand, staring at the “delete number” option and thinking: What if he forgets me the second I disappear?

Everyone online says No Contact is the golden rule after a breakup. Don’t text, don’t call, don’t stalk his socials. It sounds simple until you’re lying awake at 2 a.m. wondering if he’s lying awake too.

So I made a deal with myself. Thirty days. No contact. Just me, my sad thoughts, and a little purple app called Let It Go that tracked my streak like it was some kind of proof I was still holding on. Here’s what happened.

Day 1: The “Maybe He’ll Notice” Fantasy

I half-expected him to text me first, like my silence would suddenly make him realize everything he lost. Spoiler: he didn’t. Instead I found myself refreshing his Instagram Stories every half-hour, then deleting the app in shame.

Let It Go community snippet:

“Day 1. I keep staring at my phone like it owes me something. It’s only been 10 hours and I already hate this.”
— lost_without_u, NC Days: 1

If you’ve googled “does no contact make your ex miss you” I did too. What I found out is maybe, maybe not. What matters is that No Contact makes you notice yourself again.

Day 7: Relapse Watch

On day seven, I almost broke. I walked past his favorite café, saw someone drinking the exact iced mocha he used to order, and my fingers typed half his number before I stopped. I opened the Let It Go app instead and pressed “I almost texted” like a confession box. Seeing my seven-day streak staring back at me saved me from pressing send.

Let It Go community snippet:

“Day 8. I caved and texted. He left me on read. Starting again tomorrow. God, this is hard.”
— heartbroken_92, NC Days: 8

That’s when it hit me. I wasn’t failing slower than anyone else. I was failing at the same speed as everyone else trying to heal. And that weirdly felt comforting.

If you’re stuck in this stage, here’s more on how to move on after heartbreak.

Day 15: The Emotional Detox

This is when No Contact gets less about him and more about me. For me it was rage. All the times I swallowed hurt to keep the peace came boiling up. I journaled like a maniac. I went on runs at midnight. I cried in the shower until I looked like a puffy-eyed cryptid.

Let It Go community snippet:

“Day 15. Today I didn’t cry when I woke up. That’s the win. That’s enough.”
— phoenixrise, NC Days: 15

Here’s what psychologists say: after a breakup your brain goes through withdrawal symptoms like it’s losing a drug. That’s why the first two weeks feel unbearable. Around week three, the cravings start to ease.

Want a deeper dive? Read our guide on healing after heartbreak.

Day 30: The Quiet Power

On day thirty, I woke up and realized I hadn’t thought of him the second I opened my eyes. That sounds tiny but if you’ve been heartbroken, you know it’s monumental. I didn’t want to text. I didn’t even want him to text me.

No Contact didn’t magically erase the pain. It just built a muscle I didn’t know I had. The ability to stay on my own side.

What Google Can’t Tell You About No Contact

Search results will tell you No Contact “works” if your ex comes crawling back. But that’s the wrong metric. The real measure is this: did it bring you back to yourself?

Because when you go No Contact, you’re not ghosting him. You’re choosing you.

If you’re considering starting, check out our no contact rule guide.

Final Takeaway

If you’re here because you typed “what happens after 30 days of no contact” into Google, here’s my answer. It won’t be easy. It won’t be linear. But it will be worth it.

And if you need help staying on track, the Free breakup app has a No Contact tracker that made this challenge more real for me than just sheer willpower. It turned each day into proof I was healing, even when my heart felt stuck.

Let it Go